Miracles do happen

I wrote the last blog about how I had decided not to run the race and was really disappointed about it . My friends and my sister kept telling me till the end something would work out but I was the one who had run with painful knee and I knew this was not something that is going to work out .

The come friday I just dropped in my running shoes , just incase I felt like running . So while driving to duluth my friends kept coaxing me alteast run a mile , how can you stand there and look at those people who are running ...all the while i kept saying ya we will see . I was so terrified I will have to make a decision in the morning about running the race that I could not sleep the whole night . I kept looking at the alarm clock just hoping it will not go off .

So when I got up in the morning the easiest thing seemed to be to just put on my race clothes, get there on track and hope that I can pull myself to the 3rd mile so that my friends can come and pick me up .

Well the race started and in no time I was at the 3 mile marker , my friends were out there waiting for me , surprisingly no pain yet ..i told them meet me at 5 mile marker , i will drop out there ... they met me again at the 6 mile marker , no pain still . I told myself if I can make it to 7 miles without any pain I am finishing this race by hook or crook . So miles kept going on and I managed to run all of . All the while I kept telling myself this could not be happening , this is a miracle and I am so happy I am a part of it .

In retrospect it just seems like if you really want to do something , things have a way of turning out ..my sister kept telling me that all along and then all the wonderful friends I have who gave me the push at the right moment . Had they not pushed me I would have been standing on the sidelines wondering how it would have been if I had run .

The more I run the more it is turning out to be life changing for me . Running no longer is about physical fitness , it has a lot more surreal experiences attached to it and I am lucky to have experienced them .

Disappointment

Ok , so I never thought not being able to run the half marathon would be a thing that will cause me so much grief . I actually cried coz I am able to do it which surprised me a little coz I am not the one to get all cry baby if small things dnt work out .

Thats when I realized how big a deal this half marathon has become in my life . It has become a part of my identity , defining the person I am and seperating me from people around me .

When I finished my 10 mile run last year , it was accomplishment that stood way up all other stuff and I wanted to top that with the 13 mile this year . Although I started training officially only 2 months back , all this while I have been doing stuff to get my body in good shape for this year .

And the last thing I thought would just happened . I got a runner's knee which prevents me from doing the thing that I want to do right now ..run . I still did not give up.. new shoes , swimming , rehab exercises and a hope that all will turn out well kept me going .

Then it all came down to yesterday , if I can run 3 miles without pain today I told myself I will run the half marathon on saturday . 2 miles down , all well , no pain ...i thot this is it and then quarter a mile later the pain came back again from nowhere . Thats it all my hope was broken there .

I still have a choice I can go sweat it out and see if I can run the half marathon or just listen to my body right now and say probably this is not the right time .

But i guess this one time around I will let my body win over my mind . Though the decision of giving up this goal is going to be a painful one to make ..both literally and figuratively ..:-)